Funny Dialogues

Funny Dialogues
By Awesomeness

Funny Dialogues between the Teacher and the Student:

Teacher : Jessie, Give me a sentence which starting with the letter “I”

Jessie : I is….

Teacher : No Jessie, Always the letter “I” start like I am….

Jessie : Ok Madam.” I am the ninth letter of the Alphabet.”

Teacher : Harry, What is close to us? Australia or the moon?

Harry : The moon, sir.

Teacher : That’s wrong harry. How did you say that the moon is closer than Australia?

Harry : Because We can see the moon from here. But we can’t see Australia.

Teacher : John, Drinking more water is good or bad?

John : Undoubtedly, Good madam

Teacher : Very good, So John tell me why we drink water?

John : Because we can’t eat water, madam. That is why we drink water.

Teacher: Jack, How old is your father?

Jack: He is 6.

Teacher: How is that possible Jack?

Jack: He become a father only after I was born.

Funny Dialogues Between the Doctor and the Patient

Doctor: You are in very critical condition. you are dying and you don’t have much time.

Patient: OMG, that’s terrible. How long have I got?

Doctor: 10

Patient: 10 what? days, weeks, months or years?

Doctor: 10…9…8…7…6….

Patient: !!!!!!

Patient: Can you diagnose my illness?

Doctor: Your eyesight seems to be poor.

Patient: How did you come to that conclusion?

Doctor: Even you couldn’t read the front board sign. This is Veterinary hospital.

Patient: ?!?!?

Doctor: You have a heart problem.. So, throw away anything which makes you feel bad..

Patient: So, Can I throw your hospital charges bill?

Doctor: ???

Doctor: I have some bad news and very bad news.. What you wanna hear first?

Patient: Tell me the bad news first..

Doctor: Your lab report came and it said you have only 24 hours to live.

Patient: What the hell? Nothing could be worse than this news.. So what is the very bad news?

Doctor: I’ve been trying to reach you since yesterday..!

Patient: ?!?!?!

Patient: Doctor, is there any medicine for long life?

Doctor: Get married..!

Patient: Will it help to live a long life?

Doctor: No.. but it will avoid such thoughts….

Person: Doctor, my son swallowed our house key one month before

Doctor: But, why you bring him after a month?

Person: We had a duplicate key, so we managed.

Doctor: ?!?!

A Doctor and an Engineer love the same girl..

Doctor: Every day I give a rose to her

Engineer: But, every day I give an apple to her

Doctor: Why you give an apple to her?

Engineer: An apple a day keeps a doctor away..

Doctor: ?!?!

Random Funny Dialogue

A Student who got 0% Marks, was surprised because his all answers were seemingly correct!

Question - In which battle did Tipu Sultan Die ?..

Answer - In his Last Battle..

Question - Where was the Declaration of Independence Signed?

Answer - At the Bottom of the Page..

Question - What is the Main Reason for Divorce ?..

Answer - Marriage..

Question - Ganga Flows in which State ?..

Answer - Liquid State..

Question - When was Mahatma Gandhi Born ?..

Answer- On His Birthday..

Question - How will you Distribute 8 Mangoes among 6 People ?..

Answer - By Preparing Mango Shake..!!

Question - India Me saal bhar Sabse Zyada Baraf Kaha Girti Hai...???

Awesome Reply By Student :- "Daaru K Glass Me..."

Question- Why Hindu Law does not permit Second Marriage...???

Answer : Indian Constitution - Article 20(2)-says, "No man can be punished twice for same offence"

I do not take any credit for this. Just to make everyone have a laugh! :)

The Lobster Buisiness

The Lobster Business

By Awesomeness

ince the last 30 years, the Lobster Business has grown drastically. In about 1980, according to the Maine Department of Marine Resources, Maine had about 25 million pounds of lobsters. More and more lobsters has come to northern Maine. You probably love to eat lobsters, but you barely get to eat them. What if every day your meals were made of lobsters?

You can tell that the lobster business is increasing, but it is leaving southern New England, and further north. At the same time, the lobster population is also declining fast. So, why do these lobsters want to leave New England and all of America, and at the same time, lose the name, “the American Lobster?”

Lobster Decline

Maine waters have kept lobsters up near Maine. The Gulf of Maine is much chillier than the rest of the Atlantic coast. This is great for American lobsters, which prefer waters between about 41°F and 64.4°F (5-18°C). Historically, that’s kept the lobster population centered around Maine’s southern shores.  Before 2004, average temperatures in the Gulf of Maine had been going up at a rate of about 1.8°F every four decades.

Then they began rising at a much steeper rate—1.8°F every four years—according to a 2013 study by a team of scholars mostly from the University of Maine. This probably caused the lobsters to move even more north, which is where they live now. This has also caused lobsters from many other places to want to come to Maine waters, where they can enjoy the great cold water. Maine is their perfect temperature, so more and more lobsters gather near the Gulf of Maine.

Though they have come north to Maine, out of most of New England,  will they stay there for long, before moving elsewhere?

Global Warming

The waters in the Gulf of Maine, specifically, are warming faster than 99% of the world's oceans. Maine lobsters have already moved north about 43 miles per decade between 1968 and 2008, according to a 2013 study. While we can't know for sure what the future holds, it seems that as ocean temperatures continue to increase, lobsters will likely keep moving north, study researcher Malin Pinsky, of Rutgers University. At a rate of 43 miles per decade, it could only be 30 years or so until Maine lobsters are mostly in Canadian waters. Many scientists say that lobsters going to Canada will not be a question.

This was already starting to be proven over the last decade. Southern lobster fisheries along Long Island and Connecticut have already seen their catches drop due to lobsters moving north into Maine, which hauled record catches during the same time period, according to the Portland Press Herald. So, are the lobsters actually planning to escape the Gulf of Maine? Are we ever going to eat American Lobsters again, before they become Canadian Lobsters?

In 2013, the number of adult lobsters in New England south of Cape Cod declined to about 10 million, just one-fifth the total in the late 1990s, according to a report issued in August, 2015. The lobster catch in the region went to about 3.3 million pounds in 2013, from about 22 million in 1997.

Many sources and researchers have been tracking down the New England lobsters. Dr. Rick Wahle, research professor for the School of Marine Science at the University of Maine and founder of the American Lobster Settlement Index, is one of them. "In 2013 we saw one of the most widespread downturns in the history of [this study] for sure," Wahle said. The young populations are nearly 50 percent of what they were in 2007.

The lobsters are climbing towards the coldest waters of Maine, the first time ever before. This is a big geographic shift caused by warming waters. Lobstermen in places like Rhode Island are out of business, but the price and availability in New England still seems to be steady, because of Maine’s great catches. “It’s a shame,” said Jason McNamee, chief of marine resource management for Rhode Island’s Division of Fish and Wildlife. “It’s such a traditional, historical fishery.”

Shell Disease

Scientists have spotted shell disease from the Maine Lobsters. These make the lobsters unable to eat, and now, scientists look again to sea stars. Scientists have spotted the fact that at least one species of sea star has vanished off the coasts of Washington and British Columbia. The lobster fishery that had already decimated in southern New England, will likely be threatened in Maine. Some of this was put onto the shell disease’s shoulders.

In a 1990 study, they first saw the disease affecting lobsters. "Shell disease has devastated the southern New England lobster fishery, and now with warming, it's led to a situation where the Maine lobster industry may be at risk," one of the study's co-authors warns.

"Shell disease has devastated the southern New England lobster fishery, and now with warming, it's led to a situation where the Maine lobster industry may be at risk," one of the study's co-authors warns.

“We’re not talking about lobstermen having a bad decade. We’re talking about the entire maritime and coastal heritage of the coast of Maine,” says UMaine’s Bob Steneck. We sure all hope we will always have some lobsters to eat!

Bibliography:

Tuthil, Samantha-Rae. "Drastic New England Lobster Decline May Be Linked to

    Warmer Waters." AccuWeather.com, 13 June 2014, www.accuweather.com/en/

    weather-news/lobster-population-decline/28451706.

Guilford, Gwynn. "The Enigma behind America’s Freak, 20-Year Lobster Boom."

    Quartz, 6 Oct. 2015, qz.com/506376/lobsters-2/.

Rainey, Clint. "Climate Change Is Decimating Maine's Lobster Population."

    AOL.com, 17 Feb. 2016, www.aol.com/article/2016/02/17/

    climate-change-is-decimating-maine-s-lobster-population/21314512/.

Sullivan, Cody. "A Big Shift Is Coming to the Maine Lobster Population — and It

    Could Devastate the Local Economy." Buisiness Insider, 7 July 2015,

    www.businessinsider.com/lobsters-move-north-as-ocean-warms-2015-6.

News: Hello!

Welcome! This is the start of Awesomeness, a random place to write things. I may write a few articles, and also I might help you with a few things. I might also make you laugh. So, yep, first article will come up.

Have you ever wondered what the world would be like without lobsters? Well, the first article will tell you about the increase and decline of Maine Lobsters.